Like the onlookers of the animated version of Lord of the Rings, I thought I had narrowly averted disaster, like Gandalf at the edge of the cavern, until the flick of the dragon’s tail caught him up and swept him down to an uncertain fate, at best. Okay, I exaggerate. Nothing like that. But I did think I had averted something that came up like the dragon’s tail to kick me off balance this weekend. My heart sank, my energy went to heck, and I found myself in high anxiety, reeling from the blow. Unable to write, think, or be myself for almost 24 hours, a hollow grin as I tried to shake off the energy of the surprise.
Bad news hits us at a visceral level, and is not about cognitive changing the way we think about it or any of those things. These things literally knock the wind out of us.
Writing about it today is possible because I am fortunate enough to know about and have access to energy work, my own or others’. So I am right as rain, as they say, despite the recent shock.
The history of why I went into a tailspin, fortunately not publicly, but at least privately, is impossible to know – unless you do energy work of some kind, in which every thing and knowledge about every thing is possible. To find the history of why I was feeling so dreadful (literally dread – full) is in the metaphors stored in my energetic field, that takes a little energetic archeology to find, dislodge and release.
The why I go into a tailspin has something to do with my physiology, that in other writings I talk about. Anyone who has recovered from burnout or cancer treatment will have a faulty emotional junction box, with less resilience to the perceived jolts and swings we receive daily. The how to get out of it fast is my specialty, so I had better be proficient about it.
So… here is what we find. Strange, all of it. Corroborated by another energy worker are the images I see and feel, and the dramatic shifts, return to calm.
First, I look inside, to find where in my body the terrified feelings are lodged. Because I have practiced this technique for some time, I am able to trust what I am getting intuitively, and clearly see the image I am presented with. A black stitched leather glove, around my heart. Lovely. When we ‘get’ the images, they are not as frightening as the racing feelings we are having, just so you know. The next scene is equally unpleasant, but reassuring too, since I now have some of the root of my problem.
The stitched leather glove is some horror thing, like the Aztec on the ladder in one of the Indiana Jones, reaching in for a heart, or a sacrifice thing, when a perfect young girl is … well, you can imagine the rest and probably thankfully don’t want to. As soon as I have the image, why, I go back in holographic time and space, in my big subconscious mind, and change the image for something nicer. Hmmm. Not hard to come up with a nicer scene. How about Avatar, when ceremony leads to blue green loving in a large connected group. Yes, better than the Aztec ceremony thing, hands down. So I then replace the image. Literally, delete old image, replace with new. I can really get into the blue green Avatar thing, thank you James Cameron.
So I ‘run the colors’ of that image. While I flow those colors through my body, I realize that the energy of love and connectedness is flowing right along with the peaceful love of the blue green. Done.
Bizarre, I know it is bizarre. It was to me too, and is now wonderful, because I experience how amazing the shift is.
Because our hearts are connected to our faces (the polyvagal theory – literally the nerves of the heart are reflected on our faces), my face shifts too. Where I was feeling tense and hardly able to smile, my usual countenance has returned. Big smile, easy laugh.
There is no moral to this story. Before I had finished with the archeology, I had (through HMR – holographic memory resolution) dislodged a black gundgy thing like a nasty insides of a golf ball with all the long stringy elastic, and a hard icy cold 18Th century shot ball, from a scene on a kind of frigate, and a kind of sharp metal clamp with a bunch of metal shards. Nice! All gone.
The subconscious is a strange place. All these things are palpable to another energy worker, so it is not all in the imagination. We actually create them inside, or have the memory from other times. Enough said, must get on with my daily routine.
Be well, and embrace the strange.